Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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