Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
