sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
