I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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