some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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