I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize