How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
