my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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