Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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