Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
