yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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