Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize