Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
