She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
