It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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