drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Randomize
