idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
