Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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