i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
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he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
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