Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
