Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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