i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
