I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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