drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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