Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
