plz talk dirty to me
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
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