My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
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