Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
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