The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
