Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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