But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
