Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.