He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!