Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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