I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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