IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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