3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Houston, we have a squirter
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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