if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
