3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
too bad you live with your parents still
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
