so explain again why im purple
no
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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