She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I touched a dick in church today
Randomize
