My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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