Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
