from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
