big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
