I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
