Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
