I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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