Don't you send me to vm
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
