Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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