The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
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